another goodbye

i looked him up, my good friend, Eu Gene. he's going off to New Zealand in 3 weeks and i want to ask him out for a last time. I asked if he was free on a Sunday or Saturday? Friday's fine too. He said he's busy but probably on a Sunday. He wasn't sure and proceeded to ask me to chill. For some reason, i took it offensively. i just thought that, "chill?? is he saying our outing isn't important? if i don't ask him out, will he? i don't want to NOT have a last outing with him before he leaves. God knows when i'll ever see him again."

In a mad state, i replied "ok. fine."obviously, he knew what's up. i was slightly mad, until he unexpectedly replied.. "i'll miss you ya noe."

tears instantly welled up in my eyes.
i quickly replied, telling him to not say such words, as if he's leaving already.
but he is! he said. in exactly 3 weeks.
i told him to keep it till the last day.

i just.. really hate goodbyes. how can anyone live with them?
being close to someone, then having to say goodbye one time or another. be it, migrating to another country, going off to college, graduating, or even death.
either way, it's never easy.

he's the third one i have to say goodbye to, due to distance in another country.
first one was my BFF, off to New York back in 2010.
the second was recent, aug 2012, him, on the subway train.
so the wound of a long (perhaps forever) goodbye was still fresh.

i had a random thought bout the last outing already. which is kinda silly.
i wanna spend it in the park, with a picnic. sandwiches and all.
then we'd play guitar, and along the way, i'm gonna make a video of it all.
it'll be a good memory <3 p="p">
-rant done-