idek

i'm tired, and yet i'm not going to bed yet. soon, i keep telling myself, soon.

i looked him up for a chat, hoping that we can just keep in touch.
he told me he went out with a girl because it was her birthday.
i don't know if it bothers me much, since i didn't feel hurt.
but i don't wanna find out either. i'm not prying deeper. i just don't want to think about it.

however, it did occur to me if he purposely told me what he did, in an attempt to make me move on, because he has. either way, i know what i'm doing. it's not that i've not moved on, it's just that i'm not looking for someone new yet.
relationships. why would i want em?
they screw you up anyway.

a friend once told me, "you're only saying that now, cause you don't have someone you like."
perhaps so.